I have been dealing with too much death lately. I attended another funeral last night. Good friends of ours lost their 29-year-old son. It was very sad. As much as I think people should celebrate the death of a loved one, this would have been tough. A couple of this young man's favorite tunes, a baseball game and a few cold beers would have helped.

This young man was so alone that he had been dead for over three weeks before anyone knew. That's alone! How does a person become so separated from life? His parents don't know much about the days or weeks, or even months leading up to their little boys death. Yesterday, the day of the funeral, they received a box of his personal belongings from the San Antonio police. They could put all of his belongings in one box... it tore my heart out. The father said there were phone numbers and names of people they don't know. I pray that I never lose touch with my children. I also pray that I never have to bury one of my children. It is just wrong. When the minister had said her final words and the last sad song was sung, the father spoke briefly to the huge crowd at the service, kissed his hand and layed it on the urn holding his son's ashes and cried... so did I.

I've been walking alot lately. Long walks. I have so many things on my mind. I keep thinking that if I walk far enough the mess in my head will make some sense. Apparently I haven't walked far enough yet. It is great therapy, especially when I walk alone. However I walked with my wife for hours a couple of nights ago, and it felt good. I wonder how far I'll have to walk to clear my head. Sometimes I wish I could just erase everything and start all over. I might think things through differently...no probably not, it's just me.