Well, I'm preparing for 4 more days off from work. I'll be glad to get back to normal...whatever that is. I used to look forward to a new year with anticipation of a fresh start. After the last few years, I realize it's just another day. Hanging a new calendar on the wall, doesn't change anything. I believe you make your own luck, but I always considered a new year as motivation. Not this year. I'm not putting any stock in the new year. All it means to me is that I have to get used to writing 2008.

Four days off about drove me crazy! I'm not good at sitting around the house. I had every intention of relaxing and letting go of the daily crap. Well I didn't do a very good job of that. I couldn't let go of things and relaxing turned into laying on the recliner like a pile. I did enjoy spending time with my family. I got to see my niece and nephew and their families for the first time in a couple of years, which was cool. And I always love being with my wife and children.

We received the BEST gift possible today! The "little man" is legally our grandson. He's been our grandson for almost 3 years, now it's locked up. My son and his wife officially adopted him this morning at 9:30 am. It's been a long and sometimes scary 3 years. He lit up the court room like he has my life. On our way home, I gently squeezed my wife's leg, looked into her eyes and we shared a tear. Thank God for little miracles.

Christmas is 4 days away. This will definitely be one of the most unusual holidays I have ever spent. So much has happened this year. I will look at celebrating the birth of Jesus in a whole new light. I read something this morning in the Upper Room that said God doesn't live with us, he lives within us. That clears up some things for me. That tells me that Christmas is celebrating the birth of faith in our souls. There are no promises that we won't suffer and be tested in life. We can, however, have faith that through it all we have someone to lean on. That someone might be our own soul.

I am looking forward to the 4-day holiday. I want to spend time with family and friends, sharing life. I want to live in these 4 days as if it were all there is. A 4 day lifetime with a clean slate.

I wish all of you who stop by to read my meandering thoughts the very best for the holiday season. I hope you get everything you wish for.

PEACE

I read an article in the local rag yesterday about a patch of marijuana the cops found growing along some creek in Sioux County. The comments people wrote in about this cracked me up. They were all righteous about destroying the "weed" because it leads to meth use. Come on! Pot is not a gateway drug. It is the only party favor I'm aware of that does not require any processing. You know, alcohol or cocaine don't do much for you in their raw form. And of course meth is made from antifreeze or whatever so it's totally man made.

Maybe God put pot on earth for a reason. The story goes that He (or She) put animals and plants here to sustain man. Makes you think. Who do suppose was sitting around one day making a rope and thought, "I wonder if I could smoke this stuff?" How many things do you think they smoked before they said, "let's try that hemp again, it's good shit." I think the world would be a better place if alcohol was illegal and marijuana was OK.

Along these lines of thought, who do you suppose looked at a mushroom and decided that it looked good enough to eat? It would have been cool to be the first one to eat a mushroom and take a trip for a few days, haha. How about the egg? "Hey, Bert, instead of waiting for that chick to be born, I'm gonna eat the egg!" Or, who thought it would look cool to stick a ring through your nostril, or tongue, or penis? "Hey, I've got a great idea, I'm going to slide this hot needle through the end of my penis." What!?!?

Just some weird thoughts for the weekend.

My arms and shoulders still ache from digging a small grave Friday for a cat friend of mine. I misplaced my shovel so I used a post hole digger to dig the final resting place for the bones of Black Cat, aka Jasmine. You see, this cat was only staying at our house until our son could find a place to live that allows pets. This began a little over a year ago. For the first 6 months or so, this big black cat had nothing to do with me. Most cats are like that. They generally don't have time for humans, or other animals for that matter. Then one night when I was stretched out in my recliner, feeling kind of down, she jumped on the arm of the chair and cut into my heart with her beautiful green eyes. From that moment on, we seemed to have a connection.

It was weird. She knew when to come around and when to stay away. She never became a bother. Her eyes just drew me in. Those beautiful green eyes were mesmerizing. I've never seen an animal that would stare into your eyes like this cat. I'll miss her. I wrapped Black Cat in a towel and lowered her into the cold hard ground. I cried.

We still have two cats hanging around the house. One is a litter-mate to Black Cat and the other is from the same mama cat but a different litter. They have been left here until our son and daughter can take them with them. I hope neither of them become friendly with me. I'm tired of burying my emotions.

This week a young man walked into a mall in Omaha, Nebraska, pulled an AK47 from under his sweatshirt and opened fire. We live just 90 miles from Omaha, and have spent many hours wandering around the Westroads Mall. In fact, I've stood very near the spot this teenager stood firing round after round. When these things happen near you, in an area you are familiar with, it seems more real than when it happens 1800 miles away. I can relate to everything more.

What was this 19-year-old thinking? He left a note saying he wanted to be famous. What teenager wants to be famous for killing 8 innocent people? He killed himself, so it's not like he'll get to see himself blasted all over national news channels. I've been in some pretty messed up situations over the years, but I've never thought about killing anyone. It's hard for me to imagine what creeps into the head of a young guy like this. I don't know what this kid was dealing with. The media said his girlfriend dumped him and he lost his job at McDonalds. I certainly hope the victim's didn't lose their lives over these trivial events.

It is so sad. This would be a terrible way for your life to end, at the hands of some stranger having a bad life. No warning or time to prepare. Think of all the things these people may have left unsaid or undone. What was the last thing they said to a loved one? It really makes you think. If I died right now, with no warning, would I have any regrets? Hell yeah, I'd have some regrets. I think we all need to think about this. It makes me realize that I need to live my life like I'll be dead in a few minutes.

I've been thinking about the media lately. We all know how controlling it is. The media's power comes from the general public having an eagerness to believe it. I have always been skeptical of the media. I don't believe everything I see or hear in the media. In fact I believe many media reports have been released over the years to create fear and confusion. If you think about it, many people have more blind faith in the media than their religion of choice. That being said, I sat in church last Sunday and thought, this is nothing more than a form of media. In fact religion might be one of the best marketing campaigns ever. Now, don't get me wrong, I believe in God. Maybe not exactly like God is portrayed in the Bible, but I do believe in a higher power. I don't want to get on a religious slant here, so I'll move on.

If you look back over recent history, there are some questionable media events. Did we really have someone on the moon? Are the Palestinians the bad guys, or poor settlers being lorded over by the Israelis? Was Reagan really shot or just a president in need of an approval boost? Was there an oil shortage in the late 70's? Was Saddam Hussein killing innocent people or did our president need to push us over to his side on the war? Does anyone know what's going on in the Rain Forest? Is the Antarctic melting? I don't know the answers to these questions, but, I do know that the government controlled media made us believe all of these things to be truths.

If we'll believe things of this magnitude, getting us to cheer for a particular team, or vote for a certain candidate is easy. We all need to do our own research. Television and radio commercials are not a reliable source of information. But we are lazy. I don't go to many political rallies or post-game press conferences. I don't read the label on products I buy, and if I do I don't understand them. Let's not give in to the hype. Let's have our own thoughts. Say "NO" to the media. Don't be the strongest link in the media, word of mouth. Believe in yourself.